Well, gang, it's that time of year when the asparagus starts popping it's itty bitty yummy heads through the ground, and the neighbors start showing up in droves to collect it when I'm not looking.It's hard to believe that there are people gutsy enough to come into MY front yard, and steal my asparagus, but it happens. Regularly.
Now, you've seen my front yard... here's a little reminder in case you've forgotten...
It's big... I admit it. And yes, the asparagus is growing on the other side of the ditch bank, which is just a few feet in front of those four itty bitty trees out front. But it is still MY property, that ditch bank runs through MY grass, I pay taxes on that asparagus! It's MINE. Why do people just assume that it's a free for all?Can you tell I'm bitter about it?
It's not that we love asparagus. We like asparagus, we like it a lot. We get lots of asparagus. We like to share our asparagus. We like to share our asparagus with people of our choosing, however. Not just any old codger off the street.
One year I even put up a sign that said "please ask before stealing our asparagus." It didn't deter many folks. In fact, one day, my girls came running in the house just sobbing "someone is stealing our asparagus!" My husband walked out and politely asked if they could read. Apparently not. I didn't mind her picking it, one bit, but it would have been nice if she had asked. What did she do? She threw the asparagus on the ground and left. Did you think I lived in a classy neighborhood or what?
I haven't personally witnessed the theivery of asparagus yet this year, but I did go out to pick it on Monday morning after seeing there was massive amounts calling out my name on Sunday afternoon, only to discover that my large asparagus patch was devoid of anything but broken stems. THIEVES!!!
7 comments:
Oh my gosh! I am continually stunned by the audacity and just plain mean selfishness of people! I can't believe the lady threw down the stolen goods and walked away. I wish your husband would have tackled her or at the very least picked up the asparagus and thrown it at her. Maybe next time.
Your property is gigantic.
I would so be tempted to put up a fence with a gate and say MINE! lol
No way! NO WAY! People are so bold...and horrible!
At first I was reading along assuming it was more of your inlaw drama, but just plain old people out there who walk up and take it, even when there is a sign. Then I was thinking maybe people were mistaken, maybe it looks like wild asparagus on the side of the road. But a sign! And watchful eyes of the homeowners. Gasp! People these days!!
I can just see that lady putting out a platter of asparagus at dinner, patting herself on the back for being such a wonderful mother to nurture her children, instilling in them good habits like healthful diets and STEALING!!
Can't wait for the day you post a photo shop tutorial using her mug shot.
You need to come up with some kind of booby trap. Think Indiana Jones and a big rolling stone, or some huge pit covered in leaves. Make sure you have your camera available :) LOL
I confess, we used to pick asparagus along the canal every summer. But in my defense, I don't think it actually belonged to anybody, although there were farm fields all over by the canal, so maybe some farmer has been cursing us all our lives and we didn't even know it.
I would like to believe that we wouldn't actually blatantly pick it in front of a "please do not steal our asparagus" sign, though!
I promise not to steal any more asparagus. Especially since I have no idea where it grows around here, and oh yeah, I don't even like it!
Can I come steal your asparagus. We love it. I'd let you steal my raspberries.
booby TRAP. booby TRAP! That would drive me crazy!! I love asparagus, so I think I would be VERY territorial over it. That is awesome that you grow some though! Sounds delish!
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