Photostory Friday - Golf 101... Ishee style

My husband is an avid golfer. He eats, sleeps, and breathes golf. I .... usually just watch. My soon to be 13 year old has finally been able to hit the ball out of the front yard and into the road, which is getting dangerous, so it was time to take her off to the real course. I tagged along - to watch - to take pictures - to prove just how bad my swing is - and because the muscles in my arms haven't ached for a good long while and it was time.

Ishee, who is almost nine, taught us her way to golf - in her Golf 101 course. Won't you join me for a lesson?

First, you hit your dad's favorite course - where everybody knows his name... seriously, he's a legend here... and not just because of his golfing ability... mostly because of his talking ability... oh, the stories I could tell... this one time he was... oh wait, we don't cover that until Golf 211 - how to be asked to leave the course...
Anyway... upon arriving to said course, tacking a couple of buckets of balls on dad's tab, grab the lightest club you can find, which happens to be way too heavy for you, and hit at least three balls - then you can be done.
From there, you take a break under dad's clubs to avoid being hit by a stray ball or worse yet, the back end of a beautiful swing.
After awhile, you move under big brothers clubs so you can critique his swing and cheer him on as he tries to hit a gaggle of ducks off in the distance.
Eventually boredom will set in. At this point, you must roll down the hill. Again and again and again and then....
You drag big brother and sister to the pond to find a frog.
When you can't catch a frog without getting in the pond and dad has already said to stay out of it, you wander around until you see a frog jump under a post, then you ask the head pro if you can take out the post to catch the frog, which he does, and then you make your dad catch and release it back into the pond and then you cry because you wanted to take him home until dad promises to take you to the pet store someday and get you your very own frog.
From here, you move to the practice putting green. Big brother attempts to teach you the proper way to putt the ball, but oh, oh, oh, what is in the bottom of this hole? I wonder if there are any frogs in here?
Upon finding no frogs, you then proceed to lay in the middle in the "spread eagle" formation to add a bit more challenge to their putting.

Soon you'll discover that the practice putting green is huge and well, they can just putt around you, so you decide to annoy them by running around the edge of the putting green while singing "Oh what a beautiful morning" in your best opera "Oprah" voice until you are sure you aren't going to live and big brother will then be the hero and save you from your early demise by whisking you into his arms and carrying you to safety.
And that, my dear blog readers, is how you Golf 101. She's perfected the game, scored an "A" in the class. And to think she wonders why dad doesn't take her more often?


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