During our weekly visit to the Walmarts, we saw the cutest little puppies being given away in the parking lot. Oh my goodness, they were to die for. The husband and I have been talking for quite some time about getting a new dog around here. Nine years ago, my father in law came home one day and said "Vern has some blue heeler pups he needs to get rid of so I told him you'd take one." We didn't have any pets around here at the time so we said "SURE!"
She was cute... at first. Then she started jumping on you, and was constantly nipping at your heels. As she got older, she got ugly and she started nipping on everyones heels. She's bit more people than I can count. She's drawn blood twice... luckily both times was on my sister in law that lives next door. She still has the scars. I didn't really like her then, I don't really like her now. The dog that is.
She's going blind. She barks at everything. She pees on everything. There is nothing as nice as stepping outside on the front porch on a beautiful summer morning into a puddle of fresh dog urine. She's old and not hardly worth having, although she hasn't bit anyone for quite some time. She's just not that fun anymore, the only person she likes is the boy, and one of these days, she's going to up and die and then the boy is going to be devestated, so we thought we'd distract him with a new dog in the hopes that when the old dog dies, he won't notice. Right?
SO ... what kind of dog do we get? That is the question of the day. There has only been one kind of dog ever allowed on this property, and that's blue heelers. As far as my father in law is concerned, they are the only dogs worth owning. I've never been fond of blue heelers. They are cow dogs. I'm not a cow person. The chances of getting the "perfect" blue heeler is slim to none. You know, the one that is protective but doesn't bite all the neighbors, and yet friendly at the same time. Oh, and one that preferably doesn't eat cats would be helpful, then we wouldn't have to freak out quite so much when our fat tub of lard gets outside. In other words, I do NOT want a blue heeler. End of discussion! Apparently I have no say in the matter, but my father in law does? Technically, he does get a say because he feeds our dog and houses our dog in his barn, so....
So, the husband asks me, what kind of dog would "I" get? I like pretty dogs. Friendly and playful, but not hyper. One that will bark when someone stops by to let us know guests have arrived, but not eat them. It can't be too docile. It can't be yippy. I don't want a house dog. I don't want a big dog or a little dog. One that won't chew on everything or nip my heels. One that requires no training, they're just born smart. One that will eat the leftover pancakes without butter and syrup. Does that kind of dog even exist? Have I set the bar too high? My husband thinks so. That's why he just wants a blue heeler. They're perfect. And his dad likes them. If you get the right one that is (you'd think with the last four idiotic blue heelers they've had here, they'd be over them by now).
The puppy at Walmart... was not a blue heeler. Still... tempting. His dad would jsut have to get over it. It was just that cute. I think our cue was, though, when a lady jumped out of her car and snatched the last puppy right out of the owners arms and ran to her car. That puppy was not meant to be ours (we hadn't even gotten out of our truck, we were still discussing how stupid we were for even considering this... although I told the husband I thought it would be hilarious to bring home a new puppy that would probably have to live in the house for a few days lest it be eaten by our dog or freeze to death, keep the cat from clawing it's eyes out, and then leave town for four days next week for him to take care of it ... ha ha ha... he didn't find it so funny).
Lucky for us, they had pugs for sale across the parking lot. OH MY GOSH! Now I know why you get a pug, because they are just beyond cute when they are babies. Again, so tempting, but what would we name it? I've never met a pug that wasn't named Pugsy, and well, there's already one Pugsy in this family and he's too high maintenance for me. Besides, pugs are house dogs around here. House dogs are strictly forbidden (so are cats, really, but ours just won't take the hint).
If my husband should show up with a blue heeler one day that he got from the parking lot at sportsmans warehouse, though, (that's the parking lot they give away all the manly man dogs), I'm moving out. Just so you know...
She was cute... at first. Then she started jumping on you, and was constantly nipping at your heels. As she got older, she got ugly and she started nipping on everyones heels. She's bit more people than I can count. She's drawn blood twice... luckily both times was on my sister in law that lives next door. She still has the scars. I didn't really like her then, I don't really like her now. The dog that is.
She's going blind. She barks at everything. She pees on everything. There is nothing as nice as stepping outside on the front porch on a beautiful summer morning into a puddle of fresh dog urine. She's old and not hardly worth having, although she hasn't bit anyone for quite some time. She's just not that fun anymore, the only person she likes is the boy, and one of these days, she's going to up and die and then the boy is going to be devestated, so we thought we'd distract him with a new dog in the hopes that when the old dog dies, he won't notice. Right?
SO ... what kind of dog do we get? That is the question of the day. There has only been one kind of dog ever allowed on this property, and that's blue heelers. As far as my father in law is concerned, they are the only dogs worth owning. I've never been fond of blue heelers. They are cow dogs. I'm not a cow person. The chances of getting the "perfect" blue heeler is slim to none. You know, the one that is protective but doesn't bite all the neighbors, and yet friendly at the same time. Oh, and one that preferably doesn't eat cats would be helpful, then we wouldn't have to freak out quite so much when our fat tub of lard gets outside. In other words, I do NOT want a blue heeler. End of discussion! Apparently I have no say in the matter, but my father in law does? Technically, he does get a say because he feeds our dog and houses our dog in his barn, so....
So, the husband asks me, what kind of dog would "I" get? I like pretty dogs. Friendly and playful, but not hyper. One that will bark when someone stops by to let us know guests have arrived, but not eat them. It can't be too docile. It can't be yippy. I don't want a house dog. I don't want a big dog or a little dog. One that won't chew on everything or nip my heels. One that requires no training, they're just born smart. One that will eat the leftover pancakes without butter and syrup. Does that kind of dog even exist? Have I set the bar too high? My husband thinks so. That's why he just wants a blue heeler. They're perfect. And his dad likes them. If you get the right one that is (you'd think with the last four idiotic blue heelers they've had here, they'd be over them by now).
The puppy at Walmart... was not a blue heeler. Still... tempting. His dad would jsut have to get over it. It was just that cute. I think our cue was, though, when a lady jumped out of her car and snatched the last puppy right out of the owners arms and ran to her car. That puppy was not meant to be ours (we hadn't even gotten out of our truck, we were still discussing how stupid we were for even considering this... although I told the husband I thought it would be hilarious to bring home a new puppy that would probably have to live in the house for a few days lest it be eaten by our dog or freeze to death, keep the cat from clawing it's eyes out, and then leave town for four days next week for him to take care of it ... ha ha ha... he didn't find it so funny).
Lucky for us, they had pugs for sale across the parking lot. OH MY GOSH! Now I know why you get a pug, because they are just beyond cute when they are babies. Again, so tempting, but what would we name it? I've never met a pug that wasn't named Pugsy, and well, there's already one Pugsy in this family and he's too high maintenance for me. Besides, pugs are house dogs around here. House dogs are strictly forbidden (so are cats, really, but ours just won't take the hint).
If my husband should show up with a blue heeler one day that he got from the parking lot at sportsmans warehouse, though, (that's the parking lot they give away all the manly man dogs), I'm moving out. Just so you know...
6 comments:
I think you are a saint!
puppies are so over-rated anyway! although when our dog kicks the bucket i expect scott to last like 10 minutes without one.
My kids think I'm allergic to all animals except fish. (Is that wrong of me?! - don't care...)
I do like looking at puppies (behind the glass). Once, for a second, I almost considered getting a dog. We were looking at an adoption center. An adorable dog was in a cage and almost melted my heart. Then it barked. "let's go, kids."
If you are serious about getting a dog, and not a pug (Pugsy is a wonderful dog, even if he sheds terribly and blows snot rockets on everyone) check with the humane society or easier yet just drop in to the local pet store (I can't remember which one, petco or petsmart) on a Saturday and wander past what they have available. They may cost a few dollars, but they are well spent. The dogs are usually somewhat trained or housebroke so it helps. Myself, I stay away because it is just too tempting.
I have one of those perfect dogs. Does not shed, does not require attention, is housebroken, listens well. Never bites. Scares the other animals away, but does not eat them. Knows a few cool tricks... His name is Lucky the Incredible Wonder pup and we picked him up at Target. He does require batteries which makes him a little less perfect than just perfect, but still, no dog food so I think he is still way cheaper... Can't beat that for the best dog ever!
We also have Abby... the shed all over the place, is getting so old we have to get up five times in the middle of the night to let her out and she still has "accidents". She snores and has turned into the laziest thing ever. We should have stuck with Lucky!
You need a bulldog - only barks when it matters.
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